choboness: Lachesis

Razer Lachesis

I am definitely a sucker (stupid, stupid, boy) for brands. "Razer" one of the most distinguished and prestigious brand name for gaming hardware. I recently bought one for a whooping $139.99 (it makes me feel so much better that its not $140.00, seriously it does) and what captured and captivated me the most was the brand name itself, (heck, i don't know what Lachesis is or how to even pronounce that word) the packaging (it comes in a nice black box with green writing, green yum) and the description on the box:-

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Named after the venomous lachesis muta muta - Latin for "bringer of silent death" - the Razer Lachesis takes on the same lethal traits as its namesake that will send shivers down your enemies spines (well thats scary and deadly, definitely deadly).

"The Razer Lachesis knows no rules and takes no hostages. Victory beckons move in for the kill."

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So when I tried the viper (mouse, pardon my lameness, its terrifying), I couldnt believe it, I could not control it, moves so fast and it reacts so quickly that if i just slowly move my hand the mouse goes to the other side of the computer screen (24inch wwwwwwiiiiiiidddddeeeee screeen).

"WTFREAK!!!" said I. "How can I possibly own little nooblets now? I would epic misclick because this mouse is superfast and be called a noob in DoTA."

Feeling downcasted and downhearted that my ability to own noobs does not exist as of now when I use whats suppose to be a pro-gaming mouse which claims that it would give me an edge when I game. Grabbing the black with green writing box (its very pretty, its green) I read more details on the box. Gathering my phlethora of knowledge in the Information Technology area, I started reading the interesting chart:-

Laser Sensor: 3G (Im assuming its like mobile phones, where 3G is faster than 2G)
Sensitivity(dpi): 4000 dpi (dots per inch) more dpi = more accurate.
Tracking Speed(ips): 60 - 100 ips (inch per second) dont ask me, i have no idea.
Acceleration(g): 25(g) Im assuming, the more (g) the better it is.

Anyway, barely understanding what the numbers mean. I decided to try it out and play a couple of games of DoTA. After 1.5+ hours of gaming, I managed to play 3 games of DoTA consecutively, which was a record because I normally get bored after 2 games. I was rather impressed with my results. This mouse was awesome, it lives up to its name. It's deadly, dangerous and deathly to nooblets (like yourself most probably).

STATS DO NOT LIE